Unhappy young people – some reasons (no. 2)

There has been an inexorable rise in anxiety and depression on both sides of the Atlantic in the last 80 years. These are some of the causes:

– an unhealthy preoccupation with fame, money, image and pressure to have sex at far too young an age. This generation is faced with more sexualization and more porn than any previous generation. Girls face the most difficult challenges.
– a rise in broken relationships, such as divorce,
– a sense among some of not being in control of their lives.
– parents who expect their kids to excel at everything, who say it’s not about winning, but then celebrate winning. Actually it is very healthy to fail sometimes.
– technology, which is addictive and is also accused of affecting memory.

Some people point to problems caused in early childhood. Children aren’t learning critical life-coping skills because they never get to play like children used to play. The emphasis is on skills like reading and writing, which are insisted on far too early.

Play is brain-building for babies and young children. There is a sequence of how children develop, from the moral and emotional to the social and intellectual, says Dr. Ellen Littman, a clinical psychologist. Each phase requires building certain muscles, whether to do math, or make a friend. There is a developmental sequence and you can’t violate it all that much. But now children are expected to focus on academic tasks. In 1998, 30% of teachers believed that children should learn to read while in kindergarten. In 2010, that figure was at 80%. Playing during unstructured time, with rules set by the kids, is how kids learn independence, problem-solving, social cues, and bravery.

Then again, too many parents micro-manage their kids’ every mini-success, helping them with homework, science projects, setting rules, then wondering why they can’t set their own and grow more independent. Isn’t independence the object of it all? (Thought: how much is this over-parenting is owing to parental guilt?).

Thus, many teenagers reach their teens without the coping mechanisms and abilities of previous generations, and are very unhappy about it.

One Comment

  1. Post from Trip Reid:

    Reminds me of a piece about Vancouver where authorities felt that parks, which were designed to be super safe, needed to be made more dangerous so kids would face more challenges and
    learning experiences.

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