Recently we had a calm and interesting discussion about same sex marriage. Ranged on one side were those who felt that the word “marriage” is freighted with a long history and belonged only to the world of heterosexuals. Yes, it was right and proper that gay unions should be recognized by the law and that they should enjoy the same legal rights as anyone else, but please don’t call it “marriage”.
On the other side, two points were made, one from a gay friend in a long-term and stable union, who told us about the stress of telling her parents about her orientation and her new partner. Had she been able to say “I am getting married”, she felt that her parents would have been more accepting. It would have meant a lot to them. Secondly
was the point, apparently shared by a significant portion of the
younger population, that there were enough social problems already,what was the point of arguing over a word? If love and
commitment were involved were not these enough? We don’t have enough
love in the world.
Comments?
When the Barna Group polled Americans aged 16 to 29 on what best described Christianity, the top response was “anti-homosexual”. The other common associations were “judgmental”, “hypocritical” and “too involved with politics”. There is a fundamental change taking place in the views of young people. Politicians can no longer explain their antagonism to homosexuals by simply saying “I am a Christian”. Fewer and fewer people believe them.
From an Epicurean point of view, as long as no one sexually abuses other people (especially children); as long as they are good citizens and try to bring more happiness and joy into the world, then toleration should be the watchword. They should be ablre to use whatever word they like.
It seems indisputable that the word “marriage” is “freighted” with heterosexuality but given our greater knowledge about the biological spectrum of sexuality, why couldn’t the word “marriage” evolve to reflect that evolution? If legal realities reflect what is already happening, oughtn’t the words we use also adapt to those realities?
“[A]rguing over a word,” it seems to me, is really, struggling to communicate the complicated realities that the word is supposed to convey. The younger generation is allowing the word to be more inclusive, that is, mirror the realities they observe.
“From an Epicurean point of view, as long as no one sexually abuses other people (especially children); as long as they are good citizens and try to bring more happiness and joy into the world, then toleration should be the watchword. They should be ablre to use whatever word they like.”
Epicurus and Sister Margaret Farley hold the same position: the measure of relationships is justice and those elements that define “just.”
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