Manners

I was on a coach reently.  The coach stopped to pick up a young woman with a suitcase.  ""Well," she said," calling up to the driver in a disagreeable manner, "I can’t lift it by myself."  The driver picked up the suitcase and stowed it. The woman said nothing, no acknowledgment, no thanks.

What is it about people like that.  Badly brought up, I suppose.  What is the problem about saying ‘please’ and ‘thank-you’.  The words cost absolutely nothing.

Where I live there is a tendency for security people, immigration officers and lower level civil servants to be grim, surly, unsmiling, unapproachable.  Th silly thing is that being pleasant gets more out of others at no cost.  Like a smile a ‘please’ is cost-less. 

Epicurus believed in having lots of good friends and a good and a happy life.  You cannot have those things if you are surly and uncommunicative.  I therefore deduce that Epicurus would have been very keen on courtesy, thoughtfulness and consideration for others.

 Manners, in other words, the grease of human inter-action.

2 Comments

  1. It isn’t true that this is simply a generational problem. You come across thoughtful and considerate people of all ages. Counter-intuitively, the servicemen and women can be the most courteous and well-mannered of all. Maybe something to do with discipline? The worst are the people who think that older people don’t count and “have had their day” (no, truly!). In the bad old days of socialized this and that you never came across this point of view, but times have changed, according to our masters, for the better. You find young people failing to thank for presents or for the simple courtesies. You can’t have a continued civilization based upon these kind of people.

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