The proportion of couples who have children out of wedlock is expected to exceed the 50% mark in 2016.
Is this good for the children?
You can never know what happens in someone else’s relationship, but from the outside it looks like a startling vote of no confidence in any form of long-term commitment. Does this denote the fact that younger people, observing the broken marriages of their elders during the last fifty years, have decided there is no point in weddings (expensive and stressful) if the marrige is so likely to break up anyway? What effect does break-up have on the children, especially little children? And can a lone mother realistically hold down a job and successfully bring up disciplined and well-adjusted children without the help of an involved partner (dare I say “husband”?)
I would welcome thoughts on this. I cannot understand the mindset.
I think the Baby Boomers and subsequent generations have discredited marriage to the point where most young people don’t see the point. I’m only 17, and I will eventually get married because I like the sense of security and peace of mind that comes with it. I would also never have children until marriage because I would want them to be brought up in a stable household. Although I’m generally very socially liberal, I do not see the point of having a family outside of marriage simply because you can; it may seem old fashioned, but I think marriage is the ideal for a family, even if it is not always attainable.
I’m so pleased you feel that way about marriage. It isn’t easy finding the ideal person, but when you do there is nothing like it. Floating round, having one unsatisfactory relationship after another, is a very demoralizing experience.
For what it’s worth, one aspect of all this is to go into a relationship believing in equality, and that means doing your share of everything, including the laundry. Don’t laugh – I suspect that women find many men un-house-trained, spoiled by their mothers and firmly believing that the woman of the house should do a full time job and then look after the house and the children, mostly by herself. I’m sure other people will have observations on the failure marriage to be attractive to so many.